#HeyItsOkay ... to talk about your sex life
Maybe not at parents evening or loudly on public transport but it is definitely okay to talk about your sex life. Pick your audience wisely because ridiculously not everyone will be comfortable with it. You have 3 choices, or 4 I guess if you’re one of those weird/lucky people who would talk to family about it.
Friends: this is probably who we’re most comfortable talking about sex with. There’s nothing like having a glass of wine and gossiping about sex. I’m not even talking about giving friends a blow by blow (Pun intended) account of what you did last night. It is very rare that I divulge the gory details of what we did, mainly because it’s not going to be that interesting to someone else, but we talk about sex in general. What you like. What you dislike. What you use. What you wear. Anything you feel comfortable about. Note that I say ‘talk’ not ‘compare’. Do not compare your sex life to others. Obviously it is natural to compare but if someone is making you feel bad either directly or indirectly in these conversations then stop talking with them.
Partner: I can’t believe that people don’t do this, but talk about sex with the person you are having sex with. Durrr!!!! Me and my partner often dissect our sex life; we talk about what’s going well, what isn’t great and what we might like to try. That makes it sound very clinical but I can promise you, the couple that talk about sex have much better sex than the couple that do the deed and that’s that. If you’re not at this stage yet then talk about other people’s sex lives, or the steamy scene you’re watching on television to open a conversation.
Third Party: Finally, if you really want to talk about sex or an issue in your sex life but feel you can’t talk to your friends or partner, then seek impartial advice. There’s loads of people to reach out to who won’t blink an eyelid and will go out of their way to help. Use online forums or counsellors, you can go as far as using a sex therapist but just make sure you are talking.
It’s 2015 hey, it’s okay to talk about sex.
What do you think? Who would you talk to about your sex life?
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